Saturday, June 20, 2009

DEMISE of equality

It was Shilpa's one of the most common days of her dissappointing life. As usual, the routine of her life for the past few years ,was to dress vivdly wid plain clothes and get ready to take her bag with her to search for admission . She wanted to go to college, and learn and earn more and give back what her parents had given her. The thought of her parents gave her an overshadowing remourse of the past , the life with them . She always vividly imagined the days wen her father used to carry her to school and tell her about the things going on in science and urged her to pursue the path never tyaken by many. Her life was completely different now, first of all she is grown now, and her parents are no more who died in the godra riots. She has been brought up in hostel with the amazon grouchy warden. It was about early morning , she stood in front of the mirror checking herself giving a quick glances at her watch. wen she had done , she flew towards her bag which a steriotyped one, she didnt look if her files and certificates were fine, as she knew tat it would be undisturbed body like the unclaimed corpse in the station. She ran down the road,she hurried her steps inspite of her having a hell lot of time for the interview. She almost jogged her way to the station , which by now was completely crowded by the local mumbaikars going to their work. She hurried to keep the pace with commuters and got her ticket, she sped to the platform and checked her watch , it showed 8.15 am. She had plenty of time, the interview was at 10.00 am. the fast local arrived and the crowd got down monotonously before the train could screech to halt. She amde it a point to get into the lady's cmpartment which was difficult to be spoted among the crowded bogies of the train. With her expert eyes she got into one, just beofre the tain kleft. The train immediately spung into immense speed and there the station dissappeared. She whispered" all going gud", the journey was about 30 minutes and by the time she reached her station , the compartment was almost empty. She was nervous ,as she desperately wanted to get into this college as this was her 18th college in mumbai she is trying for,Inspite of her gud grades and excellent educational rcord she has been denied admission. She briskly got into a taxi and went to the college, she was early , atleats an hour early. She hurried to the office , the office just got up after a along weekend break, the clerk guided her to the principal room and within minutes as though knowing the whole plan of the college she reached his cabin. It wasnt open yet, it was a common site for her as she usually reaches the place well in advance, she took time to relax herself and get into the interview mood, she quickly zapped through her files and certificates and kept repeateing her intro that she was about to give, she didnt forget a bit , everytime she told her intro she was excited about it even now, this being her 19th time. The clerk called her inside, she didnt know y, she looked questioningly at him, she replied " admission ke liye , patha hai na..dus baje". she freakishly gave a smile and nod , realised the time flew out well!!, the principals room was serene, with a huge neatly put desk and a board of tropies in the side. The place smelt of morning dew. The principal, looked at her and gave her assent to sit, the interview began , she briskly gave and showed her files , the principal seems to be impressed, she was sure to get admission , the principal gave her a nod , and questioned" its been 4 years since u completed ur school and y havent u got admission before , wat were u doing for these years?" her head spinned, she just hoped tat she would nt be questioned abt tat, she bleakly replied" a job, i was doing a job, so that i cud get enuf for my college", the next question was immediately and delivered a chill to her spine" wat job?? and wer?", she tot to tell another thing but she didnt have any sort of certificates to prove tat she has been working, her happiness was gone, gone forever, it was completely overshadowed by her past, she replied" i wont tell tat", the angry principal questioningly argued with her, the debate was for about 20 minutes , she came out of the cabin, drenched with sweat, she knew for sure tat she wont get admission agian, she was completely sobbing, she ran to a quiet corner and cried aloud, she kept sobbing and screaming" y me??"" wat did i have to do wid this??" " i am not supposed to be like this" always she walked agian back to her lair disaapointed , she sobbed even more, this time it was in her room, she wanted to end her life,nothing in this world matter to her to live, all she wanted for was education, the crime which she had made of thinking of education, she made up her mind and jus ransacked her room, searching for something strong. she made a noose with her bedsheet from the fan hook , bearing a worried and scared heart about the death and pain, she got on the chair, the noose carefully on her neck, she wiped her tears and screamed but still sobbing , and she pushed the rim of chair, the noose tightened and she couldnt breathe, her death enveloped her, with a last few jerks from her body the life of this innocent gal was taken. Shilpa could'nt forget the fact that she has been denied admission , which really prickked her . She was denied inspite of gud record , just because she was a sex worker which time could never heal............

Wednesday, June 10, 2009


It was serene ,calm, and provided me with much needed time and peace which seems to be scarse in this lively and noisy city of MUMBAI. The dome seemed to be irregular offcourse getting sharp at the ends , fitted with tiny multicolored glasses,all glittering joyfully and overpowering the each other with its wonderful glitter. Overall the mosiac of glass provided a glympse of what the temple had to offer for me in near time.The surrounding contained a chamber of pillars leading to the main altar, huge hallways just like the aisle in the church and offcopurse beautifully aestically carved altar. The altar was gaurded by few saffron wrapped priest who was busy humming to their hearts content not bearing the heat of the setting sun. The hallway was a closed room which did not provide any space for darkness and dampness. Craved religious figures and painted and framed pictures of god and goddess accompanied me through the hallways. The floors were painted with beautiful multicolored designed and even the roof wasnt left idle. Everything in that place was unique and idalic.The serenity and calmness makes me to do the obvious of switching off my mobile as i didnt want to prosecute this rule in his lair.Being early evening the temple had just woken up from its afternoon nap!!The priest-an adept nimbling his fingure acroos the gods statue to get him prepared for the evening score. There is going to be huge , stupendous,overwhelming crowd of pious eldersand acediate youths who are going to accompany the elders. There wasnt much to look around the temple, few round u make u could complete prayer for all eternity, but most of the time i was just listenning to the silence which i had experienced after a very long time-silence.Silence for which i wanted to be in and fell in love with it. The sancity made me realise what i didnt notice-peace of mind and also told me the fact that i am not ALONE.

ADMIST the coast, the dome with its golden altar seen from the side of the road. The automotives dont have inside the premises, one needs to walk alone half a mile on foot along the salty breez of the ARabian sea. The sea was calm , offcourse dirty-thanks to the modernisation of this evergrowing city of mumbai. The evening breeze was gentle. however it didnt seem to be as salty as it usually was wen we visited the place for the first time. apart form the sea, there was also an arabian sea of people walking along with me to visit the architectural marvel of the past centuries. we were welcomed by a huge gateway, which supported the inner dargah of this ancient mosque. The gateway was surrounded by minars each supporting hude helium lights and offcourse the electronic loudspeakers. The gateways was painted white which semms to have got its last coat centuries before. There was a thick crowd of people believing in another set of principles than mine's. the open walls which followed the entrance was hardly to be seen , the place was chaiotic and addle, with people moving in all directions. There was a huge crowd to a dome in the centre of this closed space. IT was decorated with bright prayer cloth all accross the dargah, The dominace of arabic was accentuated , we disguised ourslefs like the traditional muslims to blend into the crowd. The energy and noise was too high to make it serene or calm. But it had something which drove them to find out. The aesthetic dome was covered with glass pieces, from the middle hung av crystal chandalier which didnt make much of dominance. RIght below it was a silver frame supporting a huge , high frangrant, decorated green cloth which seemed to be their honour of prayer.Surrounding it were the priest, humming hymns and blessing the believers by the peacock feathers. The environment right outside completely cntained the gapping people and offcourse the magnifient city of mumbai which is still healing the wounds of 26/11 attack and also the structure which fought against time and stood there for turning everyones attention.

IT was then , when i made my way to the sea to soak my feet into the warm eveving sea water. There were many people along with me , in groups, in pairs, and alone all trying to do their way to enjoy what this unknown person has gifted us-life.Once i sat onthe humid rock which was the home for many mussells before, with my foot in water, viewing the red sun dip into the sea after a long days work, i again was made to realise whati didnt notic, peace of mind. For wat i have been searching, and wat i have been greedy for and wat we all hope for- peace.Both the buldings were just mere structures to the eyes of a common man. But it is a virtual site for peace for people who is a common man , but in desperate search of something wen he is ALONE or deserted.BEFORE WE LOST SOMETHING, BUT AFTER TAJ WAS BURNT TO SONTERS, WE LOST EVERYTHING, EXCEPT HOPE TO UNITE BACK FOR PEACE EVEN THOUGH WE ARE ALONE.